Season Odes 2008/9

This section of the board is an archive of topics from Walsall's recent history - e.g. Ray Graydon's sacking, the arrival and subsequent departure of Paul Merson. It also houses the tributes paid to Jolysaddler.
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King Crimson
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Season Odes 2008/9

Thu Jul 24, 2008 5:51 am

Yet more trash.


Ode to New Signings
Mullen We’re Tired
(Music: Paul McCartney Lyrics: King Crimson)


Mullen we’re tired
Oh sign us a player or three,
Our desire is a squad we can see here
Oh Mullen we’re tired
Far have we travelled and much have we seen
Dark terraced stadia and pitches of green.
So many players now since Merson was fired
Let us sign some more soon now, ‘cos Mullen we’re tired.

Mullen we’re tired
Oh sign us a player or three,
Our desire is a squad we can see here
Oh Mullen we’re tired

Sign us a striker, a winger and then
Make them a team of ambitious young men.
We’ll cheer them on like a heavenly choir
We need names for our songs though, and Mullen we’re tired.

Mullen we’re tired
Oh sign us a player or three,
Our desire is a squad we can see here
Oh Mullen we’re tired


[Repeat chorus whilst played out of Banks’s Stadium by massed pipers]
For Beatles fans only.

Steven Roberts
(Music: Lennon/McCartnet Lyrics: King Crimson)


Gave Doncaster Rovers a call for Steven Roberts,
Day or night game first to the ball, Steven Roberts.

Steven Roberts, your a new and better man,
Fitting in our master plan,
Mullen knows he can, Steven Roberts.

One-nil down he'll pick us up Steven Roberts,
In the League or in the cup Steven Roberts

Steven Roberts, he's the man we all believe,
Has a goal there up his sleeve,
No one can succeed like Steve Roberts

[Repeat chorus until the Maharishi gets you a Balti pie]

Get yer spandex on:

Here's Jabo Again
(Music: Coverdale/Marsden Lyrics: King Crimson)


I don’t know where we’re going
But, I sure know where we’ve been
Hanging on the promises
In the odes of yesterday
Now he’s made up his mind,
From the Orient a great find
And here’s Jabo my friend
Here’s Jabo my friend

And we’ve been searching for an answer,
The twenty goal striker we’ve been looking for
Oh lord, I pray
You give us goals to move us on,
cos I know what I fear
A walk back from Edgar Street in tears

An here’s Jabo up front on his own
Playing for the saddlers’ future still unknown,
Knock the goals in and he’ll never walk alone
Now he’s made up his mind,
From the Orient a great find

And, here’s Jabo again,
Here’s Jabo again,
Here’s Jabo again,
Here’s Jabo,
Here’s Jabo again...

[Repeat chorus until tour bus and groupies arrive at The Banks's]

Ode to Dwayne Mattis
Singin’ for Dwayne

(Music: Don Lockwood Lyrics: King Crimson)


Doo-dloo-doo-doo-doo
Doo-dloo-doo-doo-doo-doo
Doo-dloo-doo-doo-doo-doo
Doo-dloo-doo-doo-doo-doo...

We’ll sing a song for Dwayne
Just sing a song for Dwayne
What a glorious feelin'
We’re winning again
We’ve legs in midfield
And pace up above
Defence full of heart
In the team that I love
Let the wingers give chase
Trying to keep their place
Come on, sing for Dwayne
Put a smile on his face
I know what I like
A midfield with a Tyke
Just singin',
Singin' up for Dwayne


Repeat chorus whilst disappointed police officer looks on.

Zaaboub star man
Music: David Bowie Lyrics: King Crimson


Zaaboub on the wing, playing there with Dwayne and Bradley,
The Walsall midfield.
He has a sun tan, a name that won't scan,
Could be the special man, then we’ll be Zaaboub’s fans.

Zaaboub really ran, orange boots and gloves in Summer
Like some French players can, he could lick 'em by dribbling
He could leave 'em to hang
Came here from Swindon Town, no chance we’re going down.

So where were the strikers while the days and the time grew short?
Just our owner to fund us,
So we bitched about his yacht and should we have a boycott?

Zaaboub plays for us, showing us that we were brilliant
The kids were in awe, he’s certain to score
Like no one before
No feat will be too far, for our new superstar.

Mesmerised by his footwork, Zaaboub sucked the defenders in
Like a Gallic messiah
When the kids all cheered the man, they had to rise up and stand

[Repeat chorus until you re-invent yourself as white soul God]



Ode to Michael Ricketts

Another Ricketts Great Goal
(Music: R Waters/D Gilmore Lyrics: King Crimson)


He don’t need no confrontation
He don’t need no fans to moan
No dark sarcasm from the touchline
Let’s sign him up from three month’s loan

Hey Saddlers! Leave our Mike alone!
All in all let’s watch another Ricketts great goal.
All in all it's just another Ricketts great goal.

Repeat chorus until Roger Waters leaves acrimoniously.

Hughes do you think you can lead us to Promotion?

Music by Jimmy Perry / Derek Taverner Lyrics: King Crimson
(Its the 'Dad's Army' theme, MMF)


Hughes do you think you can lead us to promotion?
Send us on a decent run,
We are the boys who will cheer you every game.
We are the boys who will sing aloud your name.
'Cus Hughes if you think you can lead us to promotion
That would take us out League One

Mr. Bonser’s off to Cyprus
In a year or two.
He needs us in The Championship
And so he’s turned to you.

So Hughes do you think you can lead us to promotion?
That would take us out League One.



[Repeat chorus whilst watching endless repeats on UK Gold on big screen in Stadium Suite]


"That's Reich"

(Original: Frank Sinatra Re-worked: King Crimson)


“That's Reich”, that's what all the people say.
Played for Rams and Eagles,
Now a Saddler today
Never thought I’d need to pen a tune,
For a winger still in Germany in June.

I said “that's Reich”, and as funny as it may seem
When a football he kicks,
He crosses like a dream
And we won’t go, no we won’t be going down,
'Cause this classy German’s gonna stick around

We’ve had a muppet, a thug, a sicknote,
A sulk, a has-been and a kid.
We've been up and down and over and out
Seen everything we did:
Each time we find ourselves, coming back for more,
And now with you we’ll show there’s room for Reich number 4!


”That's Reich”
I tell ya, I can't deny it,
Some thought of quitting baby,
But my heart just ain't gonna buy it.
And if I didn't think it was worth one single try,
I'd be off to Luton, and why shouldn’t I?

We’ve had a muppet, a thug, a sicknote,
A sulk, a has-been and a kid.
We've been up and down and over and out
Seen everything we did:
Each time we find ourselves, coming back for more,
And now with you we’ll show there’s room for Reich number 4!


”That's Reich”
That's Reich and I can't deny it
Many times I thought of cutting out
But my heart won't buy it
But if there's nothing shakin' come this here may
I'm gonna do some other stuff each Saturday.


[Repeat chorus while Dean Martin and Sammy Davis Jnr get the beers in]

Palmer, the Saddler
(Music: G O'Dowd, J Moss Lyrics: King Crimson)


Mullen tracked your brief career all the way
Signed you up for Walsall on an August day
You’re a man who played for Wycombe
You’re a man who’s new to town
My advice, and my prediction:
Run up and down
Run up and down

Palmer Palmer Palmer Palmer Palmer the saddler
Runs up and down
Runs up and down
Winning will be easy if defenders can keep it tight
In red and white
In red and white


Didn’t see you for the Rams each Saturday
Never saw you at County home or away
But I know, with some conviction
You will make our flank so strong
Hope you overlap forever
Don’t play it long
Don’t play it long

Hoping for more than survival
Leeds and Leicester we can rival
Hoping for more than survival
Leeds and Leicester we can rival

You’re a man who played for Wycombe
You’re a man who’s new to town
My advice, and my prediction:
Run up and down
Run up and down

[Repeat chorus until Marilyn writes nasty things about you in 'her' autobiography]


UpTheSaddlers
A tribute (inspired by Baz Luhrmann's 'Sunscreen'):


Ladies and Gentlemen of the season of ’08/9
If I could offer you only one messageboard for saddlers, UpTheSaddlers would be it. The long term benefits of upthesaddlers have been shown by pedagogue and geoff whereas the rest of my advice has no basis more reliable than my own meandering experience…I will dispense this advice now.

Enjoy the power and beauty of posting; oh nevermind; you will not understand the power and beauty of posting until you stop. But trust me, in 20 years you’ll look back at threads you contributed to and recall in a way you can’t grasp now how much opinion lay before you and how brilliant your points were….You’re not as peculiar as you imagine.

Don’t worry about the team; or worry, but know that worrying is as effective as trying to understand the land ownership issues of the club. The real troubles in your life are apt to be things that never crossed your worried mind; the kind that blindside you at 4: 45 pm on some idle Saturday. Make one post everyday that amuses you.

Edit.

Don’t be reckless with other people’s emoticons, don’t put up with people who are reckless with yours. Submit. Don’t waste your time on ‘Tests’; sometimes you’re right, sometimes you’re wrong…the member list is long, but in the end, it’s only about yourself. Remember the compliments you receive, forget the insults; if you succeed in doing this, you’re not Diddy. Keep your old messages; throw away your old avatars.

Delete.

Don’t feel guilty if you don’t post in a while…the most interesting people I know didn’t post all that often, some of the most interesting I know still don’t. Get plenty of bandwidth. Be kind to your mouse, you’ll miss it if it breaks. Maybe you’ll agree with Sheff, maybe you won’t, maybe you’ll trust the mods, maybe you won’t, maybe you’ll eat at Fan’s, maybe you’ll dance with Elaine on your 75th UTS night out…what ever you do, don’t congratulate yourself too much or berate yourself either – your choices are half chance, so are everybody else’s.

Enjoy ‘Off Topic’, read it every day you can…don’t be afraid of it, or what other people think of it, it’s the greatest forum you’ll ever use…
Log In…even if you have nowhere to do it but in your own living room. Read the AUP, even if you don’t follow it. Do NOT post on other message boards; they will only make you feel guilty. Get to know other posters; you never know when they’ll resign in a huff. Be nice to Geordie; he’s a great link to your club’s past and the person most likely to condemn you with a withering comment in the future. Understand that lurkers come and go, but for the precious few who sign up you should hold on.

Work hard to bridge our gaps in geography and lifestyle because the more of us there are, the more we need the posters to rub along with one another. Live in Beechdale once, but leave before it makes you hard; live in Park Hall once, but leave before it makes you soft. Preview. Accept certain inalienable truths, Bernie will have stats, Saigon will philander, you will get irritated, and when you do you’ll fantasize that when you registered big_baz would be there, MMF was humble and tinned respected Bonser. Respect each other’s opinions. Don’t expect anyone else to support you. Maybe you have a pension fund, maybe you have a wealthy printing business; but you never know when your ink might run out. Don’t mess too much with your username, or by the time you're Glitterati, no one will know who you are. Be careful whose advice you take, but, be patient with posters who supply it. Advice is a form of therapy, dispensing it is a way of us all trying to make sense of our own lives.

But trust me on the message board…

Ode to Albin Kajtezovic

“Albin There for You” (Music: The Rembrandts Lyrics: King Crimson)


So no coach told him life was gonna be this way
He’s sat at home, he’s broke, with no team-mates to play.
His last team was in Austria’s second tier
Don’t know if he’ll play once, every week, each month,
or even all year
but..

Albin’s there for you
When the crowd starts to roar
Albin’s there for you
No chance they will score
Albin’s there for you
'Cuz we’re there for him too...


He’s got a chance with us
To prove he is first rate
Gilmartin better worry
Mick Kearns’s new best mate
But we should warn you there’ll be days like these
When the crowd will sing for Clayton Ince
Who loves his rice and his peas, but...

Albin’s there for you
When the crowd starts to roar
Albin’s there for you
No chance they will score
Albin’s there for you
'Cuz we’re there for him too...


[Repeat chorus while sipping latte in 'Central Perk']

Ode to Chris Hutchings and Martyn O'Connor

Martyn O'C (Music: Neil Diamond Lyrics: King Crimson) - To the tune of 'Sweet Caroline'


Was at Wig-an
The other with Halesowen
But now I know we’re growin’ strong

Soon will be spring
Bouncing now we’ve no Mullen
We’re very glad you've come along

Chris… Hutchings’ fans
Scholfield out
Beat the Bulls
And beat Crewe!

Martyn O’C (oh – oh – oh)
Good times coming back for good
Legends you’ll be
Make the team play like they should


But now I
Go to the ground
And it don't seem so lonely
We fill it up cos of you two
And when we win
Carry you on our shoulders
Forget the hurt when I’m with you

Chris… Hutchings’ fans
Scholfield out
Beat the Bulls
And beat Crewe!

Martyn O’C (oh – oh – oh)
Good times coming back for good
Legends you’ll be
Make the team play like they should


Ode to Sam Williams
Williams, Cost us all of Nothing

Music: Morrissey/Marr Lyrics: King Crimson


The rain falls hard on a humdrum crowd
This crowd was once so loud
Oh, the rain falls hard on a humdrum crowd
This club was once so proud
Oh, no, a new start for us with a villan on board
And God knows we need you to shine
God knows we need to you shine
Williams, Williams cost us all of nothing
Williams, Williams cost us all of nothing
‘Cept one month’s loan ...

How can you play at The Banks’s we’ll say:
Oh ! Will you play out of your skin?
And bring the saddlers a home win?
We don’t care more for anything
Will you play out of your skin?
And bring the saddlers a home win?
We don’t dream about anything - except victory!
Oh, Williams, Williams cost us all of nothing
Williams, Williams

[Repeat Chorus until gladioli fall out yer jeans]


[Repeat chorus until the next 70s revival.]

Ode to Robin Shroot
"Walsall"

(Music: Blur Lyrics: King Crimson)
It's "Parklife", MMF :wink:

Confidence is high for the habitual players of the squad that is known as (Wal-sall)
But mid-table nowhere can be avoided if we play with Shroot - in the team that is known as
(Wal-sall)
Robin makes jaws droop, he weaves his way by the dirty full-backs
Can’t cope a bit with it (Wal-sall)
Who's that keeps on scoring?... Deeney needs more service mate... get some
width!

[Chorus]
ALL THE PEOPLE
NEED ALL THE PEOPLE
TO ALL GO TO THE STANDS
HAND IN HAND, SUPPORT WALSALL


Know what I mean
He gets up down the flank except in cases when the gaffer tells him try down the middle
(Wal-sall)
He picks the ball up, has a look to see and then he thinks about making the pass (Wal-sall)
He’ll feed the strikers, he’ll sometimes feed midfielders too, it gives us a sense of enormous wellbeing (Wal-sall)
And then we’re happy for the rest of the day safe in the knowledge there’s three points to look forward to next week too. (Wal-sall)

[Chorus]

It's got nothing to do with dirty orange shirts you know
And it's not about you Baggies who go up and down and round
Wal-sall (Wal-sall)


[Repeat chorus until feud with Oasis reaches epic proportions]

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