What is on Keates rolled up paper?

#1

Why does Deano insist on holding a rolled up piece of paper for 90 mins?

Theory A - Comfort blanket like my 2 year old son has
Theory B - Holding his contract so that JB can’t rip it up and sack him
Thoery C - Shopping list as he’s off to Morrisons after the game

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#2

It’s got a heading “the tactical nous of Dean Keates”.

The rest of the sheet is blank.

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#3

From top to bottom

  • WIM DEWIN OWKAY
  • GUD HARF
  • SHUD SCORE
  • DOW WONNA MEK A SUB
  • MISSIN CHANSES BUT DOW WONNA MEK A SUB OR CHANGE ANYFIN
  • TOP SCORAA ON BENCH BUT IL LEAVE HIM DER. LOLZ.
  • OW ■■■■. BEST GET MI TOP SCORER ON
  • ■■■■
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#4

Those bits of paper are actually his take-home pay :joy:

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#5

HAHAHAHA HILARIOUS :sleeping::sleeping::sleeping:

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#6

:rofl::rofl::rofl::rofl::rofl:

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#7

I thought it was a copy of the Beano?

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#8

When he was writing down a message in his little book I’m sure it said “Weem gonna lose this bugga to a scrambled goal two minutes into injury time” So at least he got ‘something’ right?

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#9

No idea but he has a death grip on it

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#10

Its a note from his mommy to give to Jeff in light of this seasons performances explaining its all the fault of a bald man called John for signing Luke Leahy on such a long contract.

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#11

List of targets for next season

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#12

“IZAL” (for our older readers) :wink:

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#13

IZAL. Spreader not shifter.

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#14

Perhaps it’s a massive reefer

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#15

Or an ear wax candle remover thingymebob (would explain why he keeps ignoring Martin).

May look abit big but he is only tiny.

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#16

His rolled up paper is used as a “telescope” to play " I spy with my little eye" something beginning with “R”

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#17

There’s a cognitively challenged individual that watches Whitley Bay, called Barry. He has a rolled up notepad that he blows on as he runs around the perimeter of the ground as some form of comfort. Now Barry is a bit of a character. Whitley Bay gave him the job of “program shop manager” as he has a program fetish, and he also held a job at North Tyneside Council opening post (he’s now retired). Nobody ever knew what was written on Barry’s rolled up pad until one particularly inclement day against Billingham Town the wind got a hold and blew some pages across the terraces. Those of us that had always wanted to know what was written gathered them up and it was very bizare. just list upon list of ridiculous fixtures and scores…Haggerston Castle (no such team exists), 3 Real Madrid 1, Cramlington Hospital (there might be a five a side team of that name) 4 Benfica 5…and on it went. However, no, look, If I’m honest this probably has nothing to do with Keatesy’s rolled up paper.

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